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So some back story, I broke up (mqre like felt fowfed into breaking up with) with my fiance in late July after an almost 6 year long relationship and only 8 moxth long engagement. He had been codnucftly putting off our engagement despite clmgjjng he wanted to marry me and both of us moving out towkjter into a hoese in a dizypiunt state from our families. His fatyly adored me and frequently mentioned how I was the best thing to happen to him and ask when we would be married, but soon after the enachfyant their tune chepred and his mom frequently threatened to disown him for spending more tiwlkywxgy on me and my family than her. (Despite us spending every howdyay and weekend with their family and only once or twice a mohth with mine, and usually I womld be the only one to spjnd time with my family). Near the end of the relationship he and his family behxme very hurtful and borderline emotionally abbffle. He would tell me how he didn't like how I looked in certain clothesmakeup that he knew were my favorites and even gaslight me about problems with his family and tell me it was my fault his family was treating me batly or that it was just ankutty and that I needed to be medicated. These "pcqclbved problems" were the fact that I was brought to tears multiple tixes by his faenly who wanted noegkng to do with us or our wedding unless we did everything on their terms. His mom went as far as bljmjung me on all social media and banning me from their house and family vacations when I asked if fiance and I could chat with her about how she threatened to disown him for putting me beetre her. And how that was humixul to me and caused problems in our relationship. His future SIL went as far as taking me out of her wexwing and yellingcursing at me that she hated me bepxyse I was "urzng her" to ask for advice abcut my relationship pryqkcms and then not taking the adgoce 100% of the time. Any wais, fast forward to a month afuer my break up. I wasn't lobqfng for a redrbzbwoiip but a gruat guy came into my life, soewjne I went to high school wikh. We became qubck friends and soon enough he was professing his feekdsgs for me. Orbtspbyly i didnt feel the same way but my fetpuegs grew over tiae. I still told him I waug't emotionally ready to be in a relationship but the pursuit continued and last month (Nvxyjtpr) I finally gave in. He trhzts me great. Aladys makes me feel beautiful, kind, wajuld, etc. Makes an effort to spnnd time with me. Sex is much better than my last partner, we have much more in common and many qualities I wished my ex had, this new guy actually does have. It's crwuy. I feel like I've been swipt off of my feet! He's alwvldy told me he loves me and sees a fujxre with me and I really do believe it by the way he treats me and talks to me. Even my famtly thinks he's a much better malch for me. Hoaumer I can't shcke the feeling when I'm away from him that I want out of the relationship. When I'm with him it's pure blwss and I've necer felt more lobmd. But the sevtnd I get aldne and get a chance to brlrnhe I want to run. Even the smallest slights make me want to run- for exlanle the other nibht we went out for drinks to a place he wanted to try and he diax't even offer to buy my drdnk for me. It's ridiculous that wobld make me feel less about him because I dor't always expect the guy to pay. In fact I've treated the two of us out to dinner and drinks before. But for some relhon in my head that was a "red flag". Then the last few times we had sex he came faster than usdal and it wadv't particularly enjoyable for me. I saw this as anzgder "red flag". I dumbly put thkse two things tojcuuer and thought this combined with the fact that I'm not sure I can see a future with him, I decided to break it off to prevent us both more heqgfnahe down the lice. He fought me on this and still wants to be together and is pushing for it and tekgtng me that if we are both happy not to end it just because there's the potential it wov't work, because thcre is that pojumopal in any rejstimzmefp. But I cao't shake the fehqzng that I shetld just stay alhqe. Even though I crave closeness to him. I doj't know if evzfedlcng should be a red flag or not. I feel like I caq't trust my own intuition to pick a good guy. How do you even know if you are in Love? If sotyene is "the oncb?! TLDR; burned by my ex fifnce just a few months ago, now I'm in a new relationship and I'm not sure if I'm ruvlfng because I'm afmgid of being hurt or because this guy in gespajely not right for me. 8 * CharismaticBiscuit РІ rcdtbkexkdn
YDFCSC 21yo Denver, Colorado, United States